From Freedom Girl: Have you ever cut your own hair? What were the results?
Yes, I cut my own hair in the first grade. When we were younger my mom always cut our hair, and I hated the feeling of the hairs falling on my face and ears. I figured the problem was that my hair kept growing, so I took a pair of scissors and trimmed off the sides above my ears and the front. Apparently I looked like an asylum patient. My mom had to trim it down pretty short to get it to look even.
What album are you afraid to admit you own?
I’m not afraid to admit I own any album, but I am quite embarrassed by an EP that I purchased. It’s the Tubthumping single by Chumbawumba. I even told people that I got so tired of my car that I threw it out the window, but I actually have it stored away in all its pop-culture glory.
Do you play any musical instuments?
No. I make up a lot of songs about ACWF, and Sherlock, and I sing them as they pop into my mind. I sing about the things I see, kind of like Randy Newman. I used to fake-play the violin in middle school. I consisted of me dragging the bow back and forth just above the strings so I wouldn’t make any terrible noises.
Does this look infected?
Actually, that looks gangrenous. Better check for maggots.
From Neckbone: Are you willing to admit that the unfinished, carpetless spot on the floor between your kitchen and livingroom will go forever unfinished?
Let me put up a picture so that everyone can be in on the joke. Here. Yes, I admit that it will probably always remain unfinished.
What’s better against zombies (my son asked me to ask you this- it’s true): a field hockey stick, a cricket bat or a [wooden] baseball bat?
I’m going to go with the field hockey stick. I believe that it’s about as long as the other two, which is an important factor to consider, but the benefit of the feild hockey stick is that it’s lighter, giving you the advantage of speed, and it’s got that little curly cue on the end, which is perfect for cranial penetration. Remember, the goal here is to destroy the brain. My other suggestion is to go with the weapon with which you are most comfortable. In that case, I’d pick the bat.
From KimC: Have you ever fallen asleep during a movie (not at home)?
Never. Like I mentioned as an aswer to another question, I love movies. I’ve never fallen asleep during a movie. Though I was tempted to during “Ali”. Could that biopic have BEEN any longer?
Do you read the directions first or just dive into putting things together?
I always read the directions first, which I why I get so pissed off when it STILL doesn’t go together properly. Stupid piece of crap blinds.
Can you sew on a button and hem/repair your own jeans? Yes I can. I learned how to sew when I was in the Boy Scouts (no, no one molested me, but yeah, it’s a funny joke and you’re the first one who has ever thought of it, way to go, you’re cool). I think the hem job might be a little bit messy, but if I took my time and had a decent sewing machine, I could get the job done.
From NPR Junkie: if you and the lovely ACWF do consider taking a kitty friend for Sherlock (see Glitzy above) would you consider taking Lilly (one of my 9)?
We think we might have to take on a kitten, because Sherlock seems to be a loner type cat, and I think another grown cat would threaten him.
Why do people say “dry run”? And, why is there no corresponding “wet run”? I did about 2 minutes of research trying to find out from where this term would have originated, and the results seem to be varied between fire fighters doing dry runs versus wet runs, or artillery practices with dry firing and wet firing as a connotation to sexual activity.
More from Doug: I’d like to add chiansaw to Neckbones question about Zombies.
A chainsaw would be nice, but it has the tendency to get stuck in the bone and muscle. It would probably work best on older reanimated corpses. Also, chainsaws require gas or electricity, a commodity which will surely become rapidly scarce as the dead arise. I wouldn’t want to rely on such a thing.
Some other questions, I was interrupted before since I do all this while at work:
Lights on or lights off?
Lights off. Wait, are you talking about in general, or during sex? I like to keep the lights off at work and at home until it becomes impossible to see anything. My eyes are kind of sensitive to light, so I like to keep them off. During sex I have no preference, but it’s nice to have some light so you can see what’s going on.
What is your favorite book?
Hmm, this is a tough question. I can’t think of my favorite book of all time right now, but I can tell you that I’m a fan of the Chronicles of Narnia. I always liked how C. S. Lewis skipped over all the fluffy stuff in a book (and broke the 4th wall by doing so) and always got into the story quickly. He doesn’t dilly dally, he’s just a good story-teller.
Why do cats always land on their feet?
Cats always land on their feet for the same reason humans always try to land on their feet: because it’s easier to control your landing. Cats are much more adept and turning their bodies in mid-fall to prepare to land on their feet. Humans are not, partially because we’re bipedal, frequently oriented to land on their feet.
From Dancinfairy: You’ve been out drinking last night and you feel really rough. What do you do to make yourself feel better? Lots of water, pain relievers, junk food, a couch to lay on, and a marathon of mindless programming (world’s strongest man competition, lumberjack competition, Most Extreme Elimination Challenge, etc.).
More from Common Wombat: Masturbation:
“Fun for the whole family,” or “Not just for breakfast anymore?”
I’d say, “Fun for a family breakfast!”
Speaking of masturbation, if you were (ahem) jerkin’ it, and you had to fantasize about one of the Golden Girls, which one would you choose and why? I never really watched the Golden Girls, so I’m not sure which is which, but I’m going to go ahead and say, the youngest one. That’s got to be the best answer, right. Is the youngest one like a triple amputee or something? Man, I never pick the right one.
Finally, if you were forced to kill one member of your immediate family, who would get the axe?
Oh, mokiejovis, easily. He’s a douche. Have I not mentioned this before? We had to go to court about it. “Can’t threaten family members with wood-chipper” my ass.
This is the best idea ever. Everybody’s coming up with great questions.
Yeah, I agree.
