this is really terrible. it is called porn audition.
it is sad more then funny, but at the begging i could not get my breath from laughing. later it becomes really hard to watch.

might be fake, but probably is not.

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/11/27/zombie-kiteh-w...

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/20433992.html

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/bos/13167787.html

I don’t have a joke, nor do I have any magic tricks, but I may have something that will bring a smile to your face. Or completely repulse you. Or both.

http://www.re-penetrator.com/

Enjoy.

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=ouDRDzqTu0M

And then here:

http://ca.youtube.com/watch?v=WxfIDpset2I&feature=r...

I hope this helps.

Wife says, “that’s not a pig, that’s a sheep, you idiot.”

Guy says, “I wasn’t talking to you.”

Q: What’s pink, stiff and makes women moan?
A: A dead baby.

Late one night, the only people in a bar were one man, and one woman. The guy comes up to the woman and asks her what she’s doing there.
“Well,” she says, “my man just left me because I’m too kinky for him.”

“Really,” he replies. “My wife just left me because I’m too kinky for her. Why don’t we get back to your place and be kinky?”

When they get back to her place, she goes in the back for a few moments and emerges in a rubber straitjacket, ball gag and crotchless latex pants. To her dismay, however, the man is straightening his tie and leaving.

“But I thought we were gonna be kinky together!” she says.

“Lady,” the man replies, “I already took a shit in your purse and raped your dog. Thanks for the great time.”

Enjoy….

So there’s an A road and a B road in a pub, having a drink. It’s kinda quiet, nothing much going on, until suddenly the door bursts open and a piece of green tarmac comes storming in causing a ruckus. The A road, being a big guy, gets up to deal with him. The B road, however, holds him back.

“What the hell are you stopping me for?”, asks the A road.
“Don’t start on that guy”, the B road replies, “He’s a fucking cycle path!”

How did Darth Vader know what Obi-wan was getting for christmas?
He felt his presents!

A rabbi walks into a bar with a frog on his head.
“where’d ya get THAT thing?” the bartender asks.
“BROOKLYN!” the frog exclaims. “there’s, like, MILLIONS of ‘em!”

(it’s actually the funniest when Robin Williams yells it too close to the camera lens during the end credits of “The Aristocrats”, but I thought I’d give it a shot)

A blonde is driving down the road and sees another blonde out in the middle of a field in a row boat. She stops the car and yells to the blonde in the field: “You’re the kind of blonde that gives the rest of us a bad name and if I could swim, I’d come out there and kick your ass!”

Mrs. Mulligan stands in front of her class and asks her students to put the word ‘contagious’ into a sentence:

Little Caitlins hand shoots in the air
“Yes Cailin” said Mrs. M
“When ma broother had tha chicken pox it was contagious”
“Not very original Caitlin - next” said Mrs. M “anyone else”?
Mrs. M could see little Annie’s jumping around in the back shaking her hand and it was with some trepidation she pointed to the child
“Yes Annie”
“Well my da and I were walking home in the snow last week and Mrs. P was digging her path out and he said ‘it’ll take that cunt ages to clear all that snow’”.

http://www.wintrest.com/tanning-lotion/

very corny but it cracks me up every time.

And this will hopefully give you a small chuckle:
http://garfieldminusgarfield.tumblr.com/

http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/74

I watch it when I’m feeling cranky and I laugh every time. Of course, I am known to be pretty slutty when it comes to the laughing. I won’t sleep with a guy on the first date, but I’ll laugh at any old thing he says.