Man, this week sucks. First of all, it’s the week before I go to the beach so I have to make sure all my shit is in order before I’m out of here for a week. The worst part is that no matter how much advance planning I put into it, I’ll still have idiots trying to bother me. I can put up a vacation message on my email, and a vacation message on my voicemail, and I’ll come back and hear/read messages like this:
“Hey, just wanted to check in on the project to see how it was going?”
“Hey, didn’t hear from you yesterday. Can you send an update on the project?”
“Hey, sorry to be a bother, just need to know about the project and any updates.”
“Hey, are you ever going to call back? I need those project updates!”
“Where are you?! I need those project updates now!”
This happens every time, and I think the thing that irritates me the most is that they have to read the email message that bounces back to them every time, or they have to listen to my voicemail message every time, both of which would tell them that they need to FUCK OFF for one week and wait until I get back. It’s especially terrible when they have apparently never seen a vacation message before and keep corresponding with it as if it were me, and not a robot.
“Hey, how’s the project going?”
“I will be out of the office from Friday, July 27 until Monday, August 6. If you need immediate assistance please contact Someone Iworkwith.”
“Oh, hey that’s cool, no worries. Where’d you go on vacation?”
“I will be out of the office from Friday, July 27 until Monday, August 6. If you need immediate assistance please contact Someone Iworkwith.”
“Does Someone know where you went? Why can’t you just tell me about where you’re staying?”
“I will be out of the office from Friday, July 27 until Monday, August 6. If you need immediate assistance please contact Someone Iworkwith.”
“Fine, whatever. You don’t have to be a dick.”
“I will be out of the office from Friday, July 27 until Monday, August 6. If you need immediate assistance please contact Someone Iworkwith.”
“Seriously, stop it!”
And it goes on like this FOREVER until I come back and turn off the vacation message. I don’t know why people are so stupid, but they are, and it makes me hate them. Stupid people that do stuff like this should get punched in the sausage by a 200 foot line of toddlers on tricycles. It should be like a 2-hour-long ride-by dong-punching.
I think the most irritating thing is that I don’t even have the type of job where there’s a lot of time-sensitive stuff going on. Almost nothing has a strict deadline. In fact, the deadlines are so loose that one week of difference is barely noticeable. God damnit I hate type-A assholes who make their control-freak bullshit into other people’s emergencies. A two-hour toddler cock-knocking for them all!
Don’t you love it?? I have the same thing happen here. Even with my bounce back message telling the impatient pricks who they should contact and giving them the option of contacting my admin via e-mail or phone, they still call me directly on my cell - EVERY TIME. I have less than 2 weeks until my blessed week long vacation from hell. Have fun on yours, I know I will…
Sounds like you could work in my office…
I’m going on vacation next week and this week I’ve just been sitting around with nothing to do… there’s absolutely NOTHING going on. When I come back, however, there will be dozens of “urgent” emails and I will hear stories of how someone needed something IMMEDIATELY but I wasn’t there to get it for them. Which is total crap b/c none of us do anything of ANY importance - nothing is ever REALLY needed immediately. I need a new job, I hate these people.
Have fun on your vacation - don’t think about work at ALL.
You should change your Away message to: “I told you to stop e-mailing me. Send one more email, and I’ll call the police.”
:)
Oy, stuff like that only happens to me - or so I thought. But what gets me right in the craw is when I happen to leave “happy Spring” on my voice mail and forget about it until like Ocotober and they all hear THAT and comment about what a douche I am or they constantly remind me to take the vacation message off my email. But did they read it when it actually applied? Hell the fuck no! Grrrr. I like the toddler cock-knocking idea. Alot.
Oh - happy early vacation to ya. :)
Hahah…I’m on vacation right now. And guess hat I’m doing? I’m working……
No one pays attention to anything anymore.
Mighty Dyckerson is out of the office and unavailable to comment at this time. Mighty Dyckerson will be happy to insult your blog upon his return. Thank you for your patience.
Have ever noticed that people with a misplaced sense of urgency often don’t have enough on their plates?
In exactly one week I will be setting up my out of office message FOREVER as I am leaving work and the big smoke. I will have to work locally but it is nice to think that I could put something like “I have now left [my company] so go fuck yourself” or something equally charming.
You could probably set up a rule in Outlook (assuming that’s what you use) that will auto reply a specific message to that one person. You could probably even change it around based on the date so that every day s/he emails they get a different message.
Do we work at the same place? I swear to God.
There was a place I worked at where I would go to the restroom after sitting at my desk for 7 hours straight (I kid you not) and there would be 2 voicemails and a couple of e-mails wondering where I was.
Cray-zee.