Broadsheet, from the bottom of her heart, pointed out this Yahoo article to me. It’s not very long, so I want you all to read it. I will wait here and sing one of the greatest classic rock songs ever written until you get back…
When I’m tired and thinking cold
I hide in my music, forget the day,
And dream of a girl I used to know.
I closed my eyes and she slipped away.
She slipped away.
It’s more than a feeling (more than a feeling)…
Oh, you’re back. Great.
So, I don’t really see anything wrong with this guy killing a deer and having sex with it, or finding a dead deer and having sex with that. The article isn’t clear on what exactly the circumstances were. In my mind it’s not worse to kill a deer and have sex with it than it is to kill a deer and turn it into chops, jerky, and slippers.
I mean really, is there any reason whatsoever that you should be able to tell anyone what they can do with the animal that they caught and killed? Would you walk up to Ted Nugent, The Nuge, and say, “Excuse me Mr. The Nuge, but I don’t think you should eat that deer,” or, “Hey Mr. Cat Scratch Fever, I don’t think you should wear that deer’s head as a hat and turn its hide into a thong.” Why not? Because it’s none of your goddamned business what he does with the deer.
It’s none of my business what kind of freaky crap you do in your house, and it’s none of your business what kind of freaky crap I do in my house (though I feel compelled to mention once again that I personally find necrophilia, bestiality, and necrobestiality revolting). It’s this puritanical notion that we can tell people how they can enjoy themselves that makes vibrators illegal in Alabama and Texas, and that you can’t buy beer in Baltimore County on a Sunday (or choose the favorite blue law in your area).
Now, the horse he killed is an altogether different issue because chances are the horse belonged to someone. But once the horse was dead, it doesn’t really matter what he did to it. He could have killed it and stuffed it in a sack in his attic, or shot into space on a rocket, or had sex with it. Nothing is going to bring the horse back to life, so why does it matter that he was going to hump it? Prosecute him for stealing the horse and killing it, but leave it at that.
Finally, I feel it important to note that Boston’s “More Than A Feeling” is one of the worst songs ever recorded.
Erm. Um.
My guess is that this type of behavior (ie. killing the horse in order to have “relations” with it) often predicts a serial killer future. I mean, once you’ve killed a horse to have your merry way with it… it’s just a slippery slope isn’t it? A gateway drug if you will.
Did I mention I’ve had bronchitis for two weeks? I’m on drugs.
No worries about that song anymore, since the guy’s dead now.
It’s illegal to use a vibrator in Alabama and Texas?!??!
While you are correct that More Than a Feeling is a horrible, horrible song, Mr Roboto is much, MUCH worse.
yeah..what Monkey said. Serial Killer! SERIAL KILLER!
See? I knew you’d have an opinion on that one. What I couldn’t tell from the article is who the hell caught him doing this? If in fact, he did it in the privacy of his home - I agree with you. But somehow I get the impression that this guy likes to “share” his adventures publicly, and that’s just nasty.
Like my Dad always says, nothing’s illegal unless you get caught.
Just get the guy a job in the butchering department of a pet food factory. Don’t ask, don’t tell, and everyone will be happy, right?
Nothin’ says lovin’ like a big slab of Grade A beef. (And, might I add, “More testicles means more iron!”)
Surely it would have been more cruel if he had sex with the animals while they were still alive? (Just trying to figure out if any part of this whole scenario is anything BUT wrong…)
Unfortunately, I think sex with dead animals is actually a sport here in Arkansas.
See? I didn’t even know that bullshit about vibrators being illegal in Alabama…but, if I HAD, it would’ve just been ONE MORE REASON I am SO so SO so glad I moved to Florida. I lurves my toys. Did I say too much?
ACW, you and Mokie are going to Hell for, among other things, mocking Boston so close to Brad Delp’s unfortunate passing. It’s not the best song, but it’s harmless, catchy pop-rock. Hating Pearl Jam I can understand, but there’s nothing there to hate about “More Than a Feeling” except radio and high school dance DJs overplaying it. Hate them, not the band. Plus, Tom Scholz is a musical/technological genius.
Did the guy have a hunting license? Should we do background checks and psych tests before granting permits to make sure they’re not going to screw the animals they shoot? Aren’t hunters proud of the fact that they use as much of the animals as possible? Isn’t he just maximizing the utility of the carcass? Keeps him from raping people, doesn’t it? Do I have any more rhetorical questions in me? Who knows?
Hey, at least he had the decency to kill the deer before he humped it.
Generally, I would agree with you. I cannot believe how worked up people get about others having sex with dead things; but, if he had killed the horse with the intent of buggering the fresh dead corpse, then his intent to sex it leads to motive. In fact, the murder of the horse is arguably part of the sex act itself. In this case, his desire to fuck the dead horse is relevant. Now, with the deer, I agree with you, as long as he didn’t violate any poaching laws, I don’t see what is wrong with his act. Deer hunting is a good thing, and arguably saves human lives from potentially fatal deer/car accidents. He’s using his powers for good.
I see he is being treated as a sex offender. Did he have to register as a sex offender? Is he not allowed to live within 1 mile of kennel/farm/zoo/etc.? Now, THAT would be a funny Dateline.
I am in complete agreeement. About sex, privacy, dead animals and Boston. I also think killing the horse is the really wrong part. I mean I think sex w/horses is “wrong” in the gross sense of course, but legally, it’s the stealing and killing part we should be addressing. The rest is for ratings.
Monkey- Considering his past, I think he’s going to stick with animals.
Mokie- Yeah, it’s what brought the tune to mind. Just because he’s dead doesn’t make him suddenly absolved of that sin.
Poppy- Yeah, so be sure to stay away from pervy looking cops.
jwer- Domo origato for that contribution.
Lori- Relax, most serial killers start with people.
Andrew- If he was happy with a side of beef, don’t you think he’d have that job already?
Broadsheet- Good point. Doing this in public means he violates any laws relating to not being naked in public.
Kaneda- Technically, no. Actually, yes.
Tiggerlane- Reason #323487092 that I don’t live in the South.
Jules- Yes, that was too much.
S. Reed- My only regret is that he didn’t take out Pearl Jam when he killed himself.
DL- Yes, he’s a true paragon of virtue.
DBDP- Excellent point re: motive. Also, yes, that would be an HILARIOUS Dateline. “LOL im a yung horse looking for fun omg lolz!”
Lovemonkey- I am in agreement with your agreement.
So much for lunch. What is wrong with people.
And I happen to like More Than A Feeling. It’s a high school flashback song.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH-O MISTER ROBOTO, FOR HELPING ME ESCAPE JUST WHEEEEEEEN I NEEDED TO… THANK YOU…
Wow. So very, VERY bad.
Boston maybe cheesey, but More Than A Feeling is one of the best songs on Guitar Hero :)
Just a clarification: Vibrators are only illegal in Texas if you use them for sex. However, it is perfectly fine if you use them for the sole purpose of inflicting blunt trauma on women or Mexicans.
http://dilbertblog.typepad.com/the_dilbert_blog/
Scott Adams posted about the same thing as you. So, naturally, I had to tell him that you are so awesome because you posted about this way before he did. And then I gave him a link to your blog. Wonder if it will do anything good for your traffic?
The only thing I think should be punishable should be indecent exposure or public lewdness. If it’s illegal to screw your spouse in public, then it’s also illegal to screw roadkill. If the animal was dead to begin with and the guy was using it for his own means, I don’t see what is the problem… of course, other than the OBVIOUS lack of good taste or decency, and of course the pesky bacterial problems associated with having one’s genital in an animal… who is dead.
However, if he killed the animal to get his jollies, then I think we’d be talking about animal cruelty.
I do believe though, that there should be some type of monitoring going on for that individual. I mean, if someone were sitting down eating their own feces, not only is that disgusting (much like necro-beastiality is), but it’s also an indicator of a much deeper psychological/sociological problem/perversion.
Makes me wonder if Jeffrey Dahmer ever did that.
Great post. Also More than a Feeling has been discussed in the news Ad nauseam. I just wanto to ger the effin tune out of my head!!!
And also something about sex with dead animals…