that I’ve spent the last 30 minutes or so reading Harry Potter 6: This Time It’s Not as Personal as Last Time, But More Personal Than the Third Time.
Archive for August 12th, 2005
Tonight I will be at the Lodge Bar at Power Plant for a free happy hour party that I won. They have dollar drinks and cheap appetizers and no cover. All you have to do is give them my real name at the door. If you’re interested in meeting up with me, ACWF, Kmart, Mike, and Mike’s wife. Just send me an email and I’ll give you my name so you can get in.*
BUT DON’T FORGET THE REAL BALTIMORE BLOGGER HAPPY HOUR LATER THIS MONTH
Fool and Epiphany in Baltimore are hosting. Everyone should go to their happy hour.
*If you’re in Baltimore, and if you’re coming tonight, and if I feel like I can trust you. I gotta protect my neck, ya heard?
That new Coke commercial with G Love makes me want to put my sack in a garlic press. More accurately, it makes me want to put G Love’s sack in a garlic press while I try to find out how the hell he makes commercial decisions.
“First it was Coors Light wasn’t it? You had to sell your laid-back beer-ballad to that anti-choice pisswater merchant didn’t you? You fucking bastard. And if that wasn’t bad enough, you NOW sell your soul to duplicate what was originally a cultural sham! Are you a fucking idiot?”
I bought G Love’s 2nd album after I saw them perform on Letterman. I liked the sound, so I listened to the disc at the local record store and I bought it. I also bought another CD.
I introduced the G Love to a few friends. I listened to it occasionally for a few months and then lent it to a buddy of mine. He, subsequently, never returned it, as he is sometimes wont to do, and eventually HE became the person who took the reigns on all things G Love.
His younger brother picked it up by osmosis, and not too long after that we were watching his popularity grow, and seeing him play in larger and larger venues throughout Maryland.
Then G Love went super-big for a minute. Then came that goddamn Coors commercial. And now the damn Coke commercial. Seriously man. Have you learned nothing from MC Hammer?
The other album I bought with the G Love album was a compilation from the Letterman show, Live on Letterman. It was a pretty good comp then, but now it’s become a time capsule for the musicians featured on the album. It’s like they’ve been crystallized into that era.
Anyway, one of the tracks on there is laughably terrible. It’s Van Morrison, Sinead O’Connor and The Chieftains, and it’s a trainwreck of noise. The Cheiftains, for all they’ve got going for them, end up sounding like yokels in a jug band. Sinead drops the mic at the end of the song. And Van Morrison, well, lets just say you can hear the results of dozens of years of drug use as he Shatnerizes the song. You can almost hear him stumbling up to the microphone with his eyes half closed. At one point he starts babbling incoherently as if it’s some sort of filler to the chorus. I wish I could have seen the look on everyone’s faces.
Here’s a quick peek at his lunacy.
That’s my story about why I hate the new Coke commercial.
