1 UPDATE BELOW
There’s a nativity set up on the roof of a porch near my apartment in Baltimore. This nativity is the plastic, light-up kind, and is typical in every way (aside being 20 feet off the ground and on top of a porch roof).
Joseph and Mary look lovingly over their newborn child, silently wondering in their empty plastic heads how the hell they got everyone to believe she was still a virgin. The plastic animals stand quietly, and off to one side, slowing filling the manger with methane, and eventually driving the family of the savior into the streets. The Wise Men appear as if they are about approach the slighty askew Baby “Lite Brite” Jesus. One bears gold, one frankinsence, and one a ray gun.
You see, the third wise man is a green plastic alien that stands 6 inches taller than the other 2 wise men. I’m not sure if the owner is commenting on the Christian tradition, if they are having a little fun, or if they want angry Christians to throw rocks at their house (in keeping with the Christmas spirit of giving), but it’s hilarious. Maybe he was just there to probe and dissect the manger animals.
The first time I saw it I was with Kmart, and I said, “Ha ha. There was an alien in that manger.” Kmart didn’t believe (heathen) so I drove the car around the block so he could take a better look. Sure enough, there was a giant, green, glowing alien between Melchior and Balthasar.
UPDATE: The story of the nativity is now in the Baltimore Sun and there’s a picture so you can see what I mean. If that link doesn’t work, or if you need a login and password you can go to Bugmenot.com and get one. Or you can use the one Bugmenot gave me:
login- fuckthebaltsun
password- 123456
