So Kmart and I saw “A Dirty Shame” last night. It was really funny, and it definitely felt like a John Waters type of movie. The plot plugged along whether or not the continuity was there, and each scence was set up to be hilarious and disgusting and then move on to the next scene. It was sort of like a roller coaster, but not in the stupid “movie critic” way, but more in a very realistic sense. The movie took you to small peaks of laughter and disgust, then took you back down again, then back up to laughter and disgust. At the end of the movie the peaks were higher and the valleys were fewer and further between.
As a huge benefit, I learned a few new terms for different sexual acts, though I laughed too early at a “top decker” joke, so everyone in the audience knew I was a pervert. Though anyone who regularly reads Dan Savage’s column should know about 60 percent of the acts depicted/described in the movie.
I know why the movie got a NC17 rating (apparently Tracey Ullman picking up a bottle with her vagina, which I thought would be just across the NC17 line, was nothing compared some of the rest of the movie) but really, there’s nothing in this movie that I wasn’t joking around about when I was 13. Poop jokes? Check. Sex jokes? Check? Sex and poop jokes? Check. I’d say the only difference is that I just didn’t know the terminology when I was 13. “Do I want to go shrimping? Sure, I love shrip! Are we going to Red Lobster? Why are you laughing?”
And finally, what the hell is up with people in Baltimore going to see comedies? DO YOU EVER LAUGH?! There was some laughter, but not like there should have been. The last 15 minutes of the movie was one visual joke after another, and Kmart and I seemed to be the only ones laughing. Dendrophiles would have gotten aroused, but us, we was laughin’.
In conclusion, I’m taking NO2 to the movies from now on, our society is too weird about sex, and I owe Kmart 6 bucks.
Now, I’m off to pound some cabbage.
